Wow. God never ceases to amaze me. Over the past few days, caught up in the hustle and bustle of Christmas shopping and family visits, I somehow forgot to spend my quality time with God and reading His Word for a few days in a row. In the back of my mind I kept telling myself, “Stop what you’re doing and spend time with God.” Being as human as I am and a natural “know-it-all” I told rationalized and thought, “It’s okay. God will understand that I’m too busy for Him.”
Too busy for God?
Boy was I wrong. Who do I think I am to tell God that I am too busy for HIM, my creator and my sustainer — the one from whom all blessings flow.
What followed was a maelstrom of reminders about who I was before I allowed God to perform a miracle in my life. The darkest thought was the concept that somehow crept into my mind where I was considering one day in the future being able to pick up the bottle again, but be responsible about it.
The funny thing is that I had tried this before and I picked up right where I had left off, practically as if I had never stopped. What was happening in my life now that I was more prepared to drink socially? Nothing. I wasn’t even making time for God over the past few days because I was “too busy”.
Something else happened that I won’t post about here (nothing that serious, I’d just prefer to keep it private out of respect for the other party). It involved he-said she-said stuff about me from over a year ago. How did that manage to surface up at this time?
Connect to God
The only reason I can think of is that I was disconnected from God.
I look at it this way: life without God, for me, was a storm. Constant trouble. Risky behavior. Dumb decisions. Once I let God into my life he provided me with shelter and protection.
Right outside his protection is the storm just waiting to come back in and cause havoc. My temporary disconnection from God allowed parts of that storm to start creeping back in. I thank God for this reminder of what life was and could be like without Him.
I choose Him.